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Beer and Drinking Quotes
This is one of the largest beer and drinking quotes lists that you will find on the internet. We've divided them into categories and you can use the shortcuts below to find what you are looking for. Norm quotes from Cheers can be found here.
Authors, Poets, and Playwrights
Politicians and Founding Fathers
Celebrities and Entertainers
- Simpsons -
"Ah that's just drunk talk, sweet beautiful drunk talk." ~Barney Gumbal
"I'm worried about the beer supply. After this case and the other case - we only got one case left." ~Barney Gumbal
"Ok, class, today we'll be sitting quietly with the lights off, because teacher has a hangover." ~Edna Krabappel
"I used to rock 'n roll all night and party everyday. Then it was every other day. Now I'm lucky if I can find half an hour a week in which to get funky." ~Homer Simpson
"All right, brain, I don't like you and you don't like me - so let's just do this and I'll get back to killing you with beer." ~Homer Simpson
"Bart, a woman is like beer. They look good, they smell good, and you'd step over your own mother just to get one!" ~Homer Simpson
"I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer."
"I am in NO condition to be driving...wait a minute! I shouldnt be listening to myself...I'M DRUNK!" ~Homer Simpson
"Homer no function beer well without." ~Homer Simpson
"The answer to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a beer bottle, they're on TV." ~Homer Simpson
"Oh no! What have I done? I smashed open my little boy's piggy bank, and for what? A few measly cents, not even enough to buy one beer. Wait a minute, lemme count and make sure... not even close." ~Homer Simpson
"You must love this country more than I love a cold beer on a hot Christmas morning." ~Homer Simpson
"I like my beer cold ... my TV loud ... and my homosexuals flaming." ~Homer Simpson
"Alcohol is my way of life, and I aim to keep it." ~Homer Simpson
"Oh, well, of course, everything looks bad if you remember it." ~Homer Simpson
"Ah beer, my one weakness. My Achilles heel if you will." ~Homer Simpson
"To alchohol, the cause of and solution to all life's problems." ~Homer Simpson
"Now son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for daddies, and kids with fake IDs." ~Homer Simpson
DOUGH... the stuff... that buys me beer
RAY... the guy that sells me beer
ME... the one... who drinks the beer
FAR... a long run to get beer
SO... I'll have another beer
LA... I'll have another beer
TEA... no, thanks, I'm drinking beer
That will bring us back to (looks into empty glass) D'OH!
"Stop wallowing in self-pity. Now pull yourself together and come get drunk with us." ~Karl
"Alcohol and nightswimming. It's a winning combination." ~Lenny
"Fruit rollups for Bart. Beer rollups for Homer." ~Marge Simpson
"You can't seriously want to ban alcohol. It tastes great, makes women appear more attractive, and makes a person virtually invulnerable to criticism." ~Mayor Quimby
"Smithers, this beer isn't working, I don't feel any younger or funkier." ~Mr. Burns
"Welcome to the sacred order of the Stonecutters who since ancient times have split the rocks of ignorance which obscure the light of knowledge and truth. Now let's all get drunk and play ping pong!" ~Number One
"Want some pretzels?"
"No thanks, we're on duty. A couple beers would be nice, though."
- Family Guy -
Lois: "Oh, my God! You can only play the piano when you're drunk!"
Peter: "Now that's not true! I can also vomit, fall down and make dirty calls to your sister when I'm drunk!"
~The Family Guy
"Hey, barkeep, whose leg do you have to hump to get a dry martini around here?" ~The Family Guy
Lois: "Peter, what did you promise me?"
Peter: "That I wouldn't drink at the stag party."
Lois: "And what did you do?"
Peter: "Drank at the stag pa-- ... Whoa. I almost walked into that one."
Peter (after coming home drunk): "Oh, Lois thank God it's you! The last few houses I went to were very rude."
Lois: "You're drunk again."
Peter: "No, I'm just exhausted 'cause I've been up all night drinking."
~The Family Guy
"Now kids, Daddy only drank so the Statue of Liberty would take her clothes off." ~The Family Guy
Lois: "Oh my God, my baby's drunk!"
Peter: "No I'm not! Oh--him. Yeah, he's a real lightweight."
~The Family Guy
Peter: "Woah! Is that really the blood of Christ?"
Peter: "Man, that guy must have been wasted 24 hours a day, huh?"
~The Family Guy
"C'mon, let's go drink 'til we can't feel feelings anymore." ~The Family Guy
"Wow, it's like I've died and went to heaven. But then they realized it wasn't my time yet. So they sent me to a brewery." ~The Family Guy
"Lois, everyone has their sanctuary. The Catholics have churches, fat people have Wisconsin, and I have the Pawtucket Brewery." ~The Family Guy
- Authors, Poets, and Playrights -
"In wine there is wisdom. In beer there is strength. In water there is bacteria." ~Harvey Allen, 1889-1949
"Religions change, beer and wine remain." ~Harvey Allen, 1889-1949
"Nobody drove me to drink... but they had to drive me back." ~John Barleycorn
"I saw a notice that said "Drink Canada Dry" and I've just started." ~Brendan Behan
"Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure." ~Ambrose Bierce
"In the Bowling Alley of Tomorrow, there will even be machines that wear rental shoes and throw the ball for you. Your sole function will be to drink beer." ~Dave Barry
"Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer." ~Dave Barry
"I like beer. On occasion, I will even drink beer to celebrate a major event such as the fall of communism or the fact that the refrigerator is still working." ~Dave Barry
"Your guess is as good as mine. Better probably, because you haven't had four beers." ~Dave Barry
"Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza." ~Dave Barry
"When I heated my home with oil, I used an average of 800 gallons a year. I have found that I can keep comfortably warm for an entire winter with slightly over half that quantity of beer." ~Dave Barry
"Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see with the naked eye unless you have been drinking." ~Dave Barry
"Something has been said for sobriety, but very little." ~John Berryman
"When you stop drinking, you have to deal with this marvelous personality that started you drinking in the first place." ~Jimmy Breslin
"Be always drunken. Nothing else matters: that is the only question. If you would not feel the horrible burden of time weighing on your shoulders and crushing you to the earth, be drunken continually." ~Charles Baudelaire, French poet and critic (1821-1867)
"Anybody can be a non-drunk. It takes a special talent to be a drunk. It takes endurance. Endurance is more important than truth." ~Charles Bukowski, American writer, The Movie: Barfly
"Man, being reasonable, must get drunk; The best of life is but intoxication." ~Lord Byron
"I drink when I have occasion, and sometimes when I have no occasion." ~Miguel De Cervantes
"I think a man ought to get drunk at least twice a year just on principle, so he won't let himself get snotty about it." ~Raymond Chandler
"There's nothing wrong with sobriety in moderation." ~John Ciardi
"Alcohol is necessary for a man so that he can have a good opinion of himself, undisturbed by the facts." ~Finley Peter Dunne
"The secret of drunkenness is, that it insulates us in thought, whilst it unites us in feeling." ~Ralph Waldo Emerson, American poet and philosopher (1803-1882)
“A well-made Martini or Gibson, correctly chilled and nicely served, has been more often my true friend than any two-legged creature.” ~M. F. K. Fisher
“Sometimes I wish I’d went through those good times stone cold sober so I could remember everything,” he said, “but then again, if I had been sober the times probably wouldn’t have been worth remembering.” ~F. Scott Fitzgerald
"The easiest way to spot a wanker in a pub is to look around and find who's drinking a Corona with a slice of lemon in the neck." ~Warwick Franks
"There is nothing for a case of nerves like a case of beer." ~Joan Goldstein
"What's drinking? A mere pause from thinking!" ~George Gordon
"I often sit back and think, I wish I’d done that, and find out later that I already have." ~Richard Harris
"An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools." ~Ernest Hemmingway
"It was a natural as eating and to me as necessary, and I would not have thought of eating a meal without drinking beer." ~Ernest Hemmingway
"An malt does more than Milton can to justify God's ways to man" A.E Houseman
"Well, as he brews, so shall he drink." ~Ben Jonson
"I'm Catholic and I can't commit suicide, but I plan to drink myself to death." ~Jack Kerouac
"I work until beer o'clock." ~Stephen King
"Payday came and with it beer." Rudyard Kipling
"If beer is liquid bread, then Guinness is liquid cake." ~Naveen Kumar
"You can't drink all day...Unless you start in the morning." ~Gary Larson
"Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer." ~Henry Lawson
"Prohibition makes you want to cry into your beer and denies you the beer to cry into." ~Don Marquis
"The chief reason for drinking is the desire to behave in a certain way, and to be able to blame it on alcohol." ~Mignon McLaughlin
"Keep your libraries, your penal institutions, your insane asylums...give me beer. You think man needs rule, he needs beer. The world does not need morals, it needs beer... The souls of men have been fed with indigestibles, but the soul could make use of beer." ~Henry Miller
"I drink to make other people interesting." ~George Jean Nathan
For art to exist, for any sort of aesthetic activity to exist, a certain physiological precondition is indispensable: intoxication. ~Friedrich Nietzsche
"He was a wise man who invented beer." Plato
"Fill with mingled cream and amber, I will drain that glass again. Such hilarious visions clamber Through the chambers of my brain. Quaintest thoughts--queerest fancies, Come to life and fade away: What care I how time advances? I am drinking ale today." ~Edgar Allan Poe
"Drink is the feast of reason and the flow of soul." ~Alexander Pope
"It is most absurdly said, in popular language, of any man, that he is disguised in liquor; for, on the contrary, most men are disguised by sobriety." ~Thomas de Quincy
"When I drink, I think; and when I think, I drink." ~Francois Rabelais, French writer and satirist (1494-1553)
"I drink no more than a sponge." ~Francois Rabelais
"I drink for the thirst to come." ~Francois Rabelais
"I will make it a felony to drink small beer" ~William Shakespeare
"Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life." ~George Bernard Shaw
"I recommend...bread, meat, vegetables, and beer." ~Sophocles
"An alcoholic is anyone you don't like who drinks more than you do. ~Dylan Thomas"
"Cover a war in a place where you can't drink beer or talk to a woman? Hell no!" ~Hunter S. Thompson
"There is an ancient Celtic axiom that says 'Good people drink good beer.' Which is true, then as now. Just look around you in any public barroom and you will quickly see: Bad people drink bad beer. Think about it." ~Hunter S. Thompson
"Of the demonstrably wise there are but two: those who commit suicide, and those who keep their reasoning faculties atrophied by drink." ~Mark Twain
Is very drear.
Up with the glass,
Down with the beer!
"Beer, of course, is actually a depressant, but poor people will never stop hoping otherwise." ~Curt Vonnegut, Jr.
"Beer commercials are so patriotic: 'Made the American Way.' What does that have to do with America? Is that what America stands for? Feeling sluggish and urinating frequently?" ~Evelyn Waugh
"Work is the curse of the drinking classes." ~Oscar Wilde
"Moderation is a fatal thing-- nothing succeeds like excess." ~Oscar Wilde
The problem with some people is that when they aren't drunk, they're sober." ~William Butler Yeats
"Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time." ~Catherine Zandonella
- Politicians and Founding Fathers -
"I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me." ~Winston Churchill
"I may be drunk, but in the morning I'll be sober and you'll still be ugly." ~Winston Churchill
"My rule of life prescribed as an absolutely sacred rite smoking cigars and also the drinking of alcohol before, after and if need be during all meals and in the intervals between them." ~Winston Churchill
"There can't be good living where there is not good drinking." ~Benjamin Franklin
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." ~Benjamin Franklin
"If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don't actually live longer; it just seems longer." ~Clement Freud
It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues. ~Abraham Lincoln
"I am a firm believer in the people. If given the truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crisis. The great point is to bring them the real facts, and beer." ~Abraham Lincoln
"I believe, if we take habitual drunkards as a class, their heads and their hearts will bear an advantageous comparison with those of any other class. There seems ever to have been a proneness in the brilliant and warm-blooded to fall into this vice." ~Abraham Lincoln
"We old folks have to find our cushions and pillows in our tankards. Strong beer is the milk of the old." ~Martin Luther
"I've made it a rule never to drink by daylight and never to refuse a drink after dark." ~Henry Louis Mencken
"It is not the drinker, but the man who has just stopped drinking, who thinks the world is going to the dogs." ~Henry Louis Mencken
"Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world." ~Kaiser Wilhelm
- Celebrities and Entertainers -
"I hope you like Guiness, Sir. I find it a refreshing alternative to food." ~Richard Dean Anderson (Stargate SG-1)
"I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me than a full frontal labotomy." ~Fred Allen
"Do not allow children to mix drinks. It is unseemly and they use too much vermouth." ~Steve Allen
"Know the truth is in between the 1st and 40th drink." ~Tori Amos
"My advice to you... is to start drinking heavily." ~John Belushi, Animal House
"I know I'm drinking myself to a slow death, but then I'm in no hurry." ~Robert Benchley
"I've stopped drinking, but only while I'm asleep." ~George Best
“I let my drinking do the talking.” ~Humphrey Bogart
"The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind. ~Humphrey Bogart"
"People who don't drink are afraid of revealing themselves." ~Humphrey Bogart
"It only takes one drink to get me loaded. Trouble is, I can't remember whether it's the thirteenth or fourteenth." ~George Burns
"There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar." ~Drew Carey
"One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor." ~George Carlin
"I suppose I'll be able to get a drink there... I told the stewardess liquor for three... Who are the other two?...Oh, there are no other two" ~Sean Connery, Goldfinger
"I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it." ~Rodney Dangerfield
"I don't drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs." ~Robert Downey Junior
"I drink therefore I am." ~W.C. Fields
"Wouldn't it be terrible if I quoted some reliable statistics which prove that more people are driven insane through religious hysteria than by drinking alcohol." W.C. Fields
"A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her." ~W.C. Fields
"What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch?" ~W.C. Fields
"Water? Never touch the stuff! Fish fuck in it." ~W.C Fields
"Meet me down in the bar! We'll drink breakfast together." ~W.C. Fields, The Big Broadcast of 1938
"I certainly do not drink all the time. I have to sleep you know." ~W.C. fields
Man: "I have no sympathy for a man who is intoxicated all the time."
W.C. Fields: "A man who's intoxicated all the time doesn't need sympathy."
Charlie McCarthy: "Say, Mr. Fields, I read in the paper where you consumed two quarts of liquor a day. What would your father think about that?"
W.C. Fields: "He'd think I was a sissy."
"I drink with impunity...or anyone else who invites me." ~W.C. Fields
"Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water." ~W.C. Fields
"I've never been drunk, but often I've been overserved." ~George Gobel
“My uncle was the town drunk—and we lived in Chicago." ~George Gobel
"I prefer to think that God is not dead, just drunk." ~John Marcellus Huston
"I used to think drinking was the only way to be happy. Now I know there is no way to be happy." ~Laura Kightlinger
"I distrust camels, and anyone else who can go for a week without a drink." ~Joe E Lewis
All the fat guys watch me and say to their wives, "See, there’s a fat guy doing okay. Bring me another beer." ~Mickey Lolich
"Good God, if our civilization were to sober up for a couple of days it’d die of remorse on the third." ~Malcolm Lowry
"You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on." ~Dean Martin
"The whole world is drunk and we're just the cocktail of the moment. Someday soon, the world will wake up, down two aspirin with a glass of tomato juice, and wonder what the hell all the fuss was about." ~Dean Martin, The Rat Pack
"I once shook hands with Pat Boone and my whole right side sobered up." ~Dean Martin
"Let there be dancing in the streets, drinking in the saloons, and necking in the parlor." Groucho Marx
"The trouble with jogging is that the ice falls out of your glass." ~Martin Mull
“If your doctor warns that you have to watch your drinking, find a bar with a mirror." ~ John Mooney
"There are more old drunks than there are old doctors." ~Willie Nelson
"Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world." ~Jack Nicholson
"They can have my beer when they pry it out of my cold, dead hand." ~Ben Schwalb
"Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy." ~Frank Sinatra
"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day." ~Frank Sinatra
"Stay busy, get plenty of exercise, and don't drink too much. Then again, don't drink too little." ~Herman "Jackrabbit" Smith-Johannsen
"24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?" ~Stephen Wright
"My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle." ~Henny Youngman
"A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge says "You've been brought here for drinking." The drunk says "Okay, let's get started." ~Henny Youngman
"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading." ~Henny Youngman
"You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer." ~Frank Zappa
"Champagne costs too much,
Whiskey's too rough,
Vodka puts big mouths in gear.
This little refrain
Should help me explain
as a matter of fact I like beer"
~Tom T Hall
- Miscellaneous -
"The sum of the matter is, the people drink because they wish to drink." ~Rudolph Brand, early 20th century Chicago brewer
"You can only drink 30 or 40 glasses of beer a day, no matter how rich you are." ~Colonel Adolphus Busch"
"Let no man thirst for lack of Real Ale." ~Commonwealth Brewing Co.
"People who drink light beer don't like the taste of beer; they just like to pee a lot." ~Capital Brewery
We brewers don’t make beer, we just get all the ingredients together and the beer makes itself." ~Fritz Maytag, President Anchor Brewing
"Life's too short to drink poor quality, over-priced, uninspiring beer." ~Greg Michael, Hydrogeologist and Member of ABRA
"A mouth of a perfectly happy man is filled with beer." ~Ancient Egyptian Wisdom, 2200 B.C.
"Beer that is not drunk has missed its vocation." ~Meyer Breslau
"If God had intended us to drink beer, he would have given us stomachs." ~David Daye
"Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, 'It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than to be selfish and worry about my liver." ~Jack Handy
"If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose." ~Deep Thoughts, Jack Handy
"Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he's carrying a beautiful rose in his beak, and also he's carrying a very beautiful painting with his feet. And also, you're drunk.” ~Jack Handy
"A drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts." ~Steve Fergosi
"Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors... and miss." ~Robert Heinlein
"Get up and dance, get up and smile, get up and drink to the days that are gone in the shortest while." ~Simon Fowle
"Drinking provides a beautiful excuse to pursue the one activity that truly gives me pleasure, hooking up with fat hairy girls." ~Ross Levy
"Why is Australian beer served cold? So you can tell it from urine." ~David Moulton
"I got so wasted one night I waited for the stop sign to change, and it did." ~Steve Krabitz
"First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you." ~Francis Scott Key
"The difference between a drunk and a alcoholic is that a drunk doesn't have to attend all those meetings." ~Arthur Lewis
"Life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life, so get wasted all of the time and have the time of your life." ~Michelle Mastrolacasa
“You don’t know a damn thing about a man until you’ve gotten stinking drunk with him.” ~Charles Russell
"I am awake, I might as well be drinking" ~Dan Thompson
"I've always believed that paradise will have my favorite beer on tap." ~Rudyard Wheatley
"Everyone who drinks is not a poet. Some of us drink because we're not poets." ~From the movie Arthur
"Oh yes, my father drank beer, in the mornings. Later in the day, he drank anything." ~An Affair to Remember
"In wine there is wisdom, In beer there is joy. Man's way to God is with beer in hand." ~Koffyar Tribal Wisdom, Nigeria
"Beer drinkin' don't do half the harm of love makin'." ~Old New England proverb
"But the greatest love--the love above all
Even greater than that of a mother...
Is the tender, passionate, undying love,
Of one beer drunken slob for another."
~Irish love ballad
"The hard part about being a bartender is figuring out who is drunk and who is just stupid." ~ Richard Braunstein
"Whoever called it near beer was a poor judge of distance." ~Prohibition saying
"We shall drink to our partnership. Do you like gin? It is my only weakness." ~Ernest Thesiger, The Bride of Frankenstein
"Look, sweetheart, I can drink you under any goddamn table you want, so don't worry about me." ~Elizabeth Taylor, Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?
"If you were a beer, would you drink yourself? ~Eric the Drunk"
"The first drink with water, the second without water, the third like water." ~Spanish maxim
"Paintings are like a beer, only beer tastes good and it's hard to stop drinking beer." Billy Carter
"I'm dealing with my drinking problem and I have a reputation for getting things done." ~Brian Clough
"Adhere to the Schweinheitsgebot. Don't put anything in your beer that a pig wouldn't eat." ~David Geary
Raymond: "Do you want me to pour it, Frank?"
Frank: "No, I want you to fuck it. Shit, yes, pour the fuckin' beer."
~Blue Velvet, 1986
Ricky Slade (tipping waitress): "Here's 50 bucks, take this in case I get drunk and call you a bitch later."
"A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory." ~Anonymous
- Anonymous -
"Beer is the reason I get up every afternoon." ~Anonymous
"My favorite black-and-tan is a "mother-in-law": a mixture of stout and bitter." ~Anonymous
"If I saved all the money I've spent on beer, I'd spend it on beer." ~Anonymous
"I think someone should invent Beerguard, because how often do you actually spill Scotch on the carpet?" ~Anonymous
"One pint of beer ... equals 1/2 college credit in philosophy." ~Anonymous
"Being half drunk is just another way of saying 'your almost there'" ~Anonymous
"The blood is now running through my alcohol stream." ~Anonymous
"I prefer both my beer and my coffee to be dark and bitter; that way, they fit in so well with the rest of my life. Anonymous
"Beer - it's not just for breakfast anymore" ~Anonymous
"Two hands and just one mouth... - now THAT'S a drinking problem!" ~Anonymous
"He who laughs last, hasn't passed out yet." ~Anonymous
"Beer... helping white people dance since 1837." ~Anonymous
"Beer. If you can't taste it, why bother!" ~Anonymous
"WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your pants." ~Anonymous
"If nothing beats a Bud, given the choice, I'd take the nothing..." ~Anonymous
"A friend of mine stopped smoking, drinking, overeating, and chasing women --all at the same time. It was a lovely funeral." ~Anonymous
"A night sober is a night wasted, but a night wasted is really fun." ~Anonymous
"You don't have to be a beer drinker to play darts, but it helps." ~Anonymous
"How come if alcohol kills millions of brain cells, it never killed the ones that made me want to drink?" ~Anonymous
"Draft beer, not people." ~Anonymous
“Don't drink and drive, you might hit a bump and spill your drink." ~Anonymous
"Beer is the answer. I don't remember the question." ~Anonymous
"Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day." ~Anonymous
"To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a support group." ~Anonymous
"Friends don't let friends drink Light Beer" ~Anonymous
"The first thing in the human personality that dissolves in alcohol is dignity." ~Anonymous
"Everybody should believe in something - I believe I'll have another drink." ~Anonymous
"He who laughs last, hasn't passed out yet." ~Anonymous
"History flows forward on rivers of beer." ~Anonymous
"Drunk is feeling sophisticated when you can't say it." ~Anonymous
"Beauty lies in the hands of the beer holder" ~Anonymous